Love is something eternal; the aspect may change, but not the essence.
-Vincent van Gogh
If love is “eternal” as van Gogh says, then what better topic to look at through the lens of “Preserve Your Past.”
In mining for stories and documenting our memories of loved ones, one of the core themes is often love and relationships. This is one of the topics where we realize there is both history and legend blended together with the truth lying somewhere in between.
And a classic love story is about two separate entities coming together, so even here we will often find there are two versions. This makes the gathering of memories even more interesting.
In honor of the “essence” of Valentine's Day, here are 5 suggestions for places to explore when “preserving your past”:
The classic “How I met your mother” story.
This is a reference to the television show, so I am not saying to only look at your father’s version of the “how we met” story, as we all know this is a universal topic.
It is also one that will have multiple points of view and versions as it will look different to both parties. It also can be something you write of your relationship for your children or can be written from research or interviews of parents, grandparents, etc.
It also does not have to be a love relationship, but could be about a friendship.
If interviewing a couple, give time for each to share their side, and watch closely as they both go back in time as they share.
Similar to the “How we Met” story is to explore the stories of proposals and weddings.
In regards to the proposal, how did they propose? Did the person immediately accept? Where did it occur? Was it a surprise? Ask all the questions and don’t forget again to get both sides if you are able.
As far as wedding days, again there will be 2 versions. This may even start before the actual wedding. What was happening in the world at the time? Who was in the wedding party? Did everything go smoothly? Was the location special? Let the stories flow.
Examine Valentine’s Day Traditions.
Whether your own or from interviews with loved ones, are there traditions that were followed (or not) on Valentine’s Day?
Did someone give the same heart shaped box of chocolates or bouquet of flowers? Was there a year where someone forgot? Was there a year they hit it out of the park? Is the holiday not celebrated at all? Again this can be questions for self reflection or for interviewing family members.
How can you bring Valentines of the past to the present?
And finally, one of my favorite things to do after gathering memories, researching stories, and remembering traditions, is to see how you can bridge the past and present and bring them to life now.
Look at your family’s history for any remnants of old love letters or vintage editions of Valentines Day cards?
Was there a tradition you learned about above, that you’d like to bring into the present? Something special that would help bring the past to life?
My Valentine’s Exploration
As a child of the 70s and 80s, who bought store boxed sets of cards to swap at school, I would also suggest reminiscing and even researching the themed cards you remember sending your friends as a child.
I have found that a quick search can bring something that is fuzzy in the back of my memory into clear vision. Depending on your age and stage see how you can bring some of your Valentine’s memories and traditions to life in the present.
Share Your Story
If you have a surprising story or want to share a special story of your own, please share pictures of Valentine’s memories from your past on Facebook or Instagram.
Tag @PreservingThePastwithMelissaAnnKitchen on Facebook or @PresverveYourPast on Instagram.
Related Podcast Episode
Looking for ways to remember your loved ones?
Check out my latest free resource, 12 Ways to Remember Your Loved One
You can also join like-minded people, collect your memories of special moments and loved ones, and get your stories down on paper for your future generations in the Preserve Your Past Facebook Group.
Check out my book Bridging Your Past and Future: The Top 10 Items to Include When Documenting Your Personal History.